negativity

only makes you more angry, which only makes you less happy, its not worth getting mad over. nothing is. anger is just fear turned in ward.

if you are angry, stop and think, who is really being the ass whole in this situation. take some fucking responsibility for your own actions. the world would be a much better place if there were more respect in it. and ya gotta give to get baby.

i cant help it if im an optimist, i don't want to be another way, so here i go positive, positive, positive. and maby it will rub off.

hello im jay and this is my hetero life mate silent bob.

yes this is me and my jeana, hetero life mates well sorta. more like non sexual life mates, because the word hetero is no where in anything that describes me.

just talking more than anything, but what happens when i meet someone i want to have as a real life mate? she is so dam determined that she will never meat a nice guy, mostly because her record speaks for its self in this area. cough cough, mate you are a mother fucker.

but im still hoping to fall in love and find someone to build a life with. i need sex in my life, and not any more one night stanges thats all over and done with, but loving sex with someone i can talk to. i don't think this is an unreasonable request in my life, and i will figure out how to get it.

but when i do do i sy good by to my silent bob? how dose that work out?

i gues that is ust one more thing ill figure out when i get there.

felling a bit insecure

i dont believe i deserve love.

im at the moment trying to be good and lose some weight. but the more i lose the worse i feel about myself. i was such a confadent fat girl, i loved my body and didntt care what other people thought. it was a blissfull felling. ine that i havent had a whole lot in my life. but somthing happend, and i decided to lose the weight. im not sure what that some thing was. i started weight watchers with my boss and my mom, from there i ended up changing jobs, quiting that job and now im moving.. all of this wouldent have happend if i hadent decided to lose the weight.

i trust the univerce everything happens for a reason.

now i feel fat, 20 lbs thinner i feel fatter, go figure. but i have no will power right now to work out, and my diet is faltering a bit. im not sure what to do. ride it out. thats all i can think to do

my wife

yes i love her, no we are not lesbians, just roommates, but mother fucker she can be such a nag. and patronizing. talk down to me just a little more baby, make me sound like a retarded 8 year old one more time, i swear i will knock you on your ass.